Guinea Pig Union

What I'm about to tell you is something Sr. Ladrillo certainly doesn't know - I bet he was only a stack of mud when it happened. Well, the story is simple: I'm one of the few founding members of the International Human Guinea Pig Syndicate. Our main goals were to create more awareness, amongst the international community, on the importance of our contribution to human well-being, while campaigning to make our activities more professional. The idea of this project emerged during one of the several studies carried out by a secret laboratory in Lausanne - not disclosing the name of the institution was part of the contract. We were called to test a drug that would prevent astronauts' bones from suffering dehydration.

Some of my colleagues from the first International Human Guinea Pig Syndicate (Photo Olivier Christinat)

One of the most difficult part of the test was that, to recreate the "zero gravity" condition, we had to spend a week hanging heads down, like salamis. Of course, we passed all sorts of medical tests, and had training sessions to prepare us to endure such position. Researchers seemed to look after us; they asked us about our favourite music and videos and said it would be played for us during the test. However, after two days only a few participants endured the challenge. Some of them started to look as if they were going to blow up. Their eyes were just waiting for a simple gesture from their bearers to instantly spring out and roll all over the lab. Despite this unpleasant circumstance, the temptation to continue the study was high. The deal was that each participant was going to be compensated with a substantial sum of money; this sum increased as the share of those giving up the study was going to be distributed amongst those staying until the end.

As I said, it was during those days that we started discussing the creation of our Syndicate. The very reason that originated the whole thing was our perception of the researchers' lack of sensibility. Not only they saw us just like bodies, they also forgot turning the television sets upside down so we could watch properly! While hanging, we shared our views and experiences and gradually set up our project. We planned an international recruitment center where experienced human guinea pigs would teach the basic principles of our profession. We also approved a proposition to request the UN to establish an international human guinea pig day. Our commitment seemed to grow stronger as the time went by. But, as soon as the few of us remaining until the end of the experience put the feet on the ground, the project vanished and no single human guinea pig talked about our Syndicate again.

		What I'm about to tell you is something Sr. Ladrillo certainly doesn't know - I bet he was only a stack of mud when it happened. Well, the story is simple: I'm one of the few founding members of the International Human Guinea Pig Syndicate. Our main goals were to create more awareness, amongst the international community, on the importance of our contribution to human well-being, while campaigning to make our activities more professional. The idea of this project emerged during one of the several studies carried out by a secret laboratory in Lausanne - not disclosing the name of the institution was part of the contract. We were called to test a drug that would prevent astronauts' bones from suffering dehydration.

		Some of my colleagues from the first International Human Guinea Pig Syndicate (Photo Olivier Christinat)
		One of the most difficult part of the test was that, to recreate the "zero gravity" condition, we had to spend a week hanging heads down, like salamis. Of course, we passed all sorts of medical tests, and had training sessions to prepare us to endure such position. Researchers seemed to look after us; they asked us about our favourite music and videos and said it would be played for us during the test. However, after two days only a few participants endured the challenge. Some of them started to look as if they were going to blow up. Their eyes were just waiting for a simple gesture from their bearers to instantly spring out and roll all over the lab. Despite this unpleasant circumstance, the temptation to continue the study was high. The deal was that each participant was going to be compensated with a substantial sum of money; this sum increased as the share of those giving up the study was going to be distributed amongst those staying until the end. As I said, it was during those days that we started discussing the creation of our Syndicate. The very reason that originated the whole thing was our perception of the researchers' lack of sensibility. Not only they saw us just like bodies, they also forgot turning the television sets upside down so we could watch properly! While hanging, we shared our views and experiences and gradually set up our project. We planned an international recruitment center where experienced human guinea pigs would teach the basic principles of our profession. We also approved a proposition to request the UN to establish an international human guinea pig day. Our commitment seemed to grow stronger as the time went by. But, as soon as the few of us remaining until the end of the experience put the feet on the ground, the project vanished and no single human guinea pig talked about our Syndicate again.